Life...as i see it!

Monday, March 28, 2005

Listening to: Sur-Aankhien
Mood: Contemplating life

On my way back from IBA today, i heard a guy humming these lyrics..
Palat ke jo dekha
ankhien hueen namm
Aya nazar jab...
adhoora sa jeevan.

The sadness in those hooded eyes and the wistfull smile forced me to halt and look back at my own life.
Not a worthwhile deed, not a mentionable achievement.
Was i just wasting away these 2 decades...when i look back after a few yrs will i see the same gray road in the midst of nothing.

I remember my teacher holding my hand on the last day of school in 1999 and saying...
"Im leaving you the joy of living a complete mystery"
But whats in the last chapter of this mystery?

A badly written script? a weak plot?
or maybe a thriving climax with a happy ending?

listening on 9:01 PM

Sunday, March 27, 2005

Waking up today and logging on to my blog felt just like a scene from those indian movies where a drunk guy stumbles in his house at the wee hours of the nite and finds his usually shrew of a wife all dressed up, sweetly waiting for himto come home so she cud serve him dinner.
And the vbaffled fella goes...
" *EEEEEEKK* .... Mai shayad ghalat ghar mai agaya hoon behen ji!!"

Hehehe!
Thanx for dressing up my Blog Ati :-)

listening on 4:52 PM


I was hoping when I check this blog tonight I ll find something from Marium but to my surprise nothing. I was looking at the dates of the posts from her & I said to myself, she will write something in next 24 hours. My specialized skills in "Marium's psychology" are getting dull.

Marium, girl, wake up.

listening on 5:26 AM

Wednesday, March 23, 2005

Sometimes when u r at the edge of things & scared (like I m these days) scared what ll u do if something happens? & scared if it wont. Even difficult to share, but somehow u manage to spurt it out of ur lips in front of ur friend & all u get is “tumhara dimagh tu kharab nahi ho gaya? Ye bhi koi pareshan honay ki baat hai?”

That’s it. I m never gona do that again.

(Mood: *pulling hair*)

listening on 11:20 AM

Sunday, March 20, 2005

Another freakin sunday morning class!
I hope her baby gives her hell making her wake up at 4am every morning!
My class profile is published on the iba blog www.ibakarachi.blogspot.com, and it actually sounds pretty neat!
But nowadays my thoughts are breaking up and my sentences arent structured, not being able to hold on to the already threadbare rope of my hopes is another story altogether.
My PC is currently as twisted as my life is, content for a few moment n then dies down for hours.

I wish i was a guy living alone so i cud try a couple of drugs!

listening on 11:55 PM

Thursday, March 17, 2005

Here i am sitting in the IBA lab.. a glass screen seperating me from the hulabaloo if my friends and other students talking n studying in the library. The din of the atmospheres doesnt reach me in here..all i see is lips moving without any sound.
Expressions, gestures, the changing of eyes are the only indication of what they are actually expressing.

In short im just trying to avoid going over to my friends and actually studying..Bah!

listening on 1:34 PM

Monday, March 14, 2005

Listening to: Tanha Dil

Is this brief contact just the last flare of a dying candle?
or an emerging ray of hope?

I need to know!

listening on 9:06 PM

Sunday, March 13, 2005

spell your name backwards:
muiraM

have you ever had a song written about you?
Nai :-( but a couple of stories by sumone.


what song makes you cry:
All those which relate to my present condition
- Kya maine socha
- Channa Vey
-Undone - duran duran
- With or without U - U2

what song makes you laugh:
The ones i sing and actually save those files

what do you listen to before you go to sleep:
My heartbeat


Right Now

what taste is in your mouth?
Ciggarettes!
Ha! No!...Just bitter black coffee

how are you:
Hmm...bored, tired, sad, nostalgic, irritated, lost, wretched, miserable
in a nut shell im the same as i hav been for the past 2 months

have a big regret:
Yes...i regret not being able to bend destiny to suit me

what color pants are you wearing?
White

what song are you listening to?
Dj Yameen's MERI JAAN


been in love?
is there any other explanation?

when you were in the hospital last?
a very very short while ago.

Thought:
This is Pointless!

listening on 3:44 PM

Saturday, March 12, 2005

Mood: Sighing
Listening to: Dj Yamee- Kya maine socha

Luv this song...i can totally relate to it;;
Kya maine socha aur kya hua
Kya dil ne chaha aur kya mila
phir bhi dil mai aas hai
ankhon mai talash hai....
i cant relate to the last line..coz..well coz..ur not there.

If im constantly in a bad mood its not bcz i was born with it..its bcz every Effin thing in my life has to be topsy turvy.
7 days classes at IBA is inhuman...its freaky....hell i dont wanna be there on sunday mornings for the rest of the semester.
The whites of my eyes have permenantly become the REDS of my eye..need to go to the doc before i go blind..though i already know wats he gonna say *roll-eyes*
Im becoming an addict to sad Punjabi songs or the intense angry sort with the bangin of the drums overpowering the whole theme!
Specially these lines of Channa Vey...

Jandi nai akhiyan se Lali
dil darya vi laga-e-khali

Yes..understand punjabi!

listening on 10:48 PM


Dear God,
U just luv doing it dont u... :-(

listening on 10:30 PM

Wednesday, March 09, 2005

Mood: Nostalgic
Listening to: Channa Vey (Kunal Ganjawala)

Oh yeahh...
just today i made this incredible, impressive, extremely philosophical and touching speech about life and love...it just came st8 from the heart and seemed to flow on and on..mannhh i impressed myself.
And then i realized how much i missed being a DJ *sob sob*
96 im coming back!

Just as i sort out my studies *bummer*

listening on 6:55 PM


Mood: Bayzaar!
Listening to: Teri Tou!

Since the last few days, i vistited and read my own entries on my blog but couldnt write anything worthwhile.
Newayz, now that im logged on i think i should put in a few words unless the blogger ppl decide to delete my blog.
The hourlies were Bleaahh!
Ok so they were never too swesome lekin phir bhi..this time was the worst i think, wonder if i'll be able to get a decent gpa this semester :-Lifes dragging by..its ok when im at Uni but once at home...Gawwd it sux!
Nida might get married in summers *teary*...what am i gonna do widout her at IBA *cryingggggggggggggggggggggggg*

At the start of this week..i came to a conclusion that all men are pigs, sissies, cowards, friggin !@#$%^ and a lot lot moree *fuming*

listening on 6:43 PM